Oh, I just unintentionally expressed an oxymoron. But that is almost exactly how I'm feeling now.
That past episode with me bemoaning and complaining about the world and life has passed for now. Hopefully. It was just a mixed up situation when my mind wasn't thinking too straight and veered off path for a moment there and entered Depression Land.
I'm definitely in a stressful situation now what with Management final on Tuesday and me not remotely prepared for it. My plan is to just study as much as my short attention span can possibly tolerate and retain the information and wing it on that fateful Tuesday morning. Whatever happens, will eventually come to pass and I'll be so relieved when it does. My target is quite low which I'm hoping to just pass or at the most get Credit. I'm actually getting quite relaxed about Business Law on Wednesday which may not be such a good thing considering the time frame. My confidence level is unusually high for this subject and I'm aiming for a Distinction at the least. It's going to be a tough ride.
On a much happier note, I've got news that I got an unconditional offer from the University of Melbourne. I'll be granted credit exemptions for the six subjects I took last two semesters and possibly this one too if I make the grades and if I do officially accept to study there. That makes one successful application down and two more to wait for. I think I've sort of abandoned UNSW because by the time I submit my third semester results to them next year, it'll probably be a little too late. Here's to hopeful and wishful thinking that I get the firm offer from USyd soon so that I can deliberate between Sydney and Melbourne and accept it before I jet off for the land of cheap labour and goods. Pardon the sarcastic and offensive remark. It doesn't seem very viable and realistic that it'll happen but I never give up on wishful thinking.
Even with the finals still days from being over, I'm celebrating the pre-finals-are-over feelings. It's just the anticipation that shakes me and makes me shift my focus away from the important things to the more enjoyable things in the future. Focus, focus! I've already pre-selected the clothes that I'll be bundling up in China and Organizational Control isn't drilled inside my head yet. I wonder if everyone else experience this similar dire situations like me.
And at the same time, the same gnawing and nerve-rattling feelings are attacking me that whether I'll pass Management or will I be granted exemptions for the past subjects I already studied and so much more which I don't want to bore people with.
I've noticed a trend in my writing style over the past few months. It's gotten to a point which I myself find it hard to read and stomach. I tend to write about really mundane things like exams, friends, assignments, family, television, books, and the like. Well, I'm making a pre-New Year's Eve resolution to myself to be more interesting and adventurous in terms of blogging and similar writing situations.
Excuse me while I return to drowning myself in incomprehensible notes and gibberish into the night.
good luck for ur exams!! chill k? everythin'll be okay. dont get too pressured. pressure leads to tension. tension leads to frustration. frustration leads to lost intentions. so take it slow. n congrats on the uni of melbourne! :)
had this to say at 05 December, 2005 04:58
