Or do we live to suffer? It seems that the world is becoming more sadistic and sardonic every day. We love to see people, especially strangers, suffer. It is a known fact. It's in our nature. We can't help ourselves relishing in other people's misery and watch from afar in the sidelines. Our empathy means nothing to these sufferers in silence. We may stare at them with our doleful eyes and speak with mourning voices but I don't believe that most of us actually mean it. No matter how nice that person is, he will always be attracted to the wretchedness of human lives. Even the poorest of the poor probably enjoy seeing others like him suffer the same fate as another beggar. We give caringly, meaningfully and wistfully to the less fortunate. But how often do we actually feel for them, instead of feeling sorry for them? We feel sorry for people too many times already. I'm sorry that we possess such (in)humane feelings.
Everyone seems to have a sad past. A bitter memory that you wish you could forget but just can't. If only there was a way where you could erase that significant memory and everything would return to its original state before your life became a living hell. Seems exciting doesn't it? That's what I feel whenever I watch a show, whether it be an anime, TV series, drama, sitcom, or movie. Every character always seem to have a painful past and agenda that we love to see them overcome or suffer in their own distressing situation. I never realised how sadistic I really am till today. I actually enjoy watching people suffer from some emotional scarring. This has probably been going on for years already but I never took time to actually sit and grasp this reality. I feel so disgusted with myself. I feel sorry for these fictional characters wallowing in their self pity and yet I can't tear my eyes away from them and force myself to snap back into the real world. In the real world, hardly everyone actually has to deal with such a painful past or a bitter memory that would leave them so scarred that they would resort to dealing out their own brand of justice or taking one's own life. We constantly watch these happen in the idiot box without a blink of an eye or even think, "Hey, that's too ridiculous! No one can actually suffer that much and yet still be sane." It's become practically a norm. And yet not normal when we encounter such events in our own real tangible lives.
There. I got it out of my system. It's been brooding in me for the past few hours already that if I didn't have a constructive outlet to express myself, I think I might've exploded. And imagine, watching a totally fictional anime show actually made me realise this. I've watched several alike shows like this in the past but it finally struck me today. I'm a hypocrite. We're all hypocrites. Whether you agree with my views or not, I don't really give a damn. Excuse me, because I have to watch Horatio Caine wrestle with his internal pining for the woman he knows he can never love openly in CSI: Miami.
I think I've developed an embarrassingly gushing crush on this extremely good looking bishounen. (it's Japanese slang for a good looking anime male character like Aya from Weiss Kreuz; the guy above) I wish my hair could stay like that.
