Wednesday, February 08, 2006 |
23:46bereavement of a different kind
A slightly odd thing is happening to me. Or has already happened is more like it.
Perhaps it's the maturing of the times. Me maturing that is. Hitting the big 2-0. I hate how that sounds. I always thought that I'd be looking forward to being all grown up and all but now that I'm here, I don't. Not at all. I'm going to miss being (insert number from 3-9)-teen. Sigh. I should definitely be more excited and looking forward to turning twenty soon. I'm going to try but it won't be the same anymore.
I can safely say that Brokeback Mountain is not for everyone. Just watched it this afternoon. Quite embarrassed and shy to admit this fact but I cried at the end but only because it really was a sad and tragic ending to a surprisingly really quite good movie. Pushing aside the strong gay-thematic hype surrounding the movie and which actually made it so infamous in the first place, one would have just labelled it as a romantic star-crossed lovers kind of story. It wasn't the best movie ever but I wouldn't mind a second round at it. God, I'm shedding tears even now as I'm writing this because I'm thinking about that one single moving scene. I've often been a stern and strict movie-goer who tries to be strong and adamantly hold the waterworks so any movie that manages to get me to cry or even so much as shed a tear truly deserves an award. Oh wait, it already did win some.
Anyway, yeah, it really isn't for everyone because firstly, it's another movie being on the ban list in Malaysia for its less than "family-moments" themes; namely the whole homosexual and nudity things. No, God forbid there being any full-frontal nudity but I can understand that some people might not be able to tolerate and take those few selective scenes that contain the mild profanities and obscenities. So, yes, go watch it if you can because I say so. Hah! I'm getting too full of myself here. Stop me once I start babbling on about the inner and deeper non-existant meanings of 'Memoirs of a Geisha'.
On the whole and at its core, it really is a simple and tragic love story that will pull your heartstrings and possibly make you appreciate your loved ones even more after you've watched it. It really is too bad and a waste that the general Malaysian public is going to miss out on such a great and essentially character-driven film. The supporting cast was awesome as well but what really lit up the entire movie was Jake Gyllenhaal's portrayal of Jack Twist. I love him and just want to hug him for being such a cool actor. But not in that sense of 'cool' but just really cool. Yeah, I guess you could say he's my current favourite beau/actor.
I'm getting too carried away with this already so I'd better stop while I'm ahead. As in the quotable words of Jack Twist; "I wish I knew how to quit you!"
Reality check again. I've sorted out the piles of clothes that I'm planning to bring into 'Yes-s', 'No-s', and 'Maybe-s'. And the 'Maybe' pile is the second biggest one so that's not a good thing because it might merge with the biggest one being the 'Yes' pile. I've got about five or six pairs of shoes and heels that I want to bring along as well but I don't know how to pack them in. Then there're my sling bags, handbags, notebooks, and loads of personals. Other than that, everything is honky-dory. Why do people say honky-dory anyway? I hate that word. Okey-doky is fine but not the former.
My dad is probably right that I shouldn't be stressing too much about turning another year older. But I can't help feeling old. Or maybe it's just the perceptions of most adults who view us 'young-ins' who're twenty plus as young and wild and have so much to experience in our lives. I don't know about who I agree with more but I know one thing for sure. I don't want to spend the rest of my best years in life before turning another decade old wasting away not doing anything productive and fun and life-fulfilling and challenging.
Thus, it is so that I bid adieu to my teenage years and welcome the young adult stage with much fervid anticipation as to what holds in the great beyond. At least I still have four more days to relish the good teen years. Who wants to sing along to BSB's old pop songs and watch reruns of white teenage trash movies with me?
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